The intricate relationship between sexual immorality and idolatry seen in Romans 1, invites deeper thought into the dynamics of faith, belief, and who we choose to elevate in our lives. This concept might initially seem abstract or confined to seminary training, but it profoundly impacts our everyday choices, values, and the very essence of who we worship or prioritize.

Allegiance and obedience are at the heart of this notion. We know that our actions and decisions reflect our deepest beliefs and convictions--at least in the moment. When those moments reveal alignment with God, we recognize Him as the ultimate source of guidance and salvation. This is a testament to faith in God. However, when life and pain intersect, this allegiance is tested.

That’s where the concept of a "functional savior" comes into play. A functional savior is anything that momentarily replaces God as our source of trust and security. It is whatever gives you peace in the place of God. Where do you go when you feel pain or are worried or tense? Pornography, food, sex, work, binge-watching a show? What do you lean on when you are sad or lonely? Functional saviors can be as diverse as wealth, power, relationships, or even seen in our passions and desires. When faced with adversity or temptation, shifting our trust from God to these more tangible, immediate sources of comfort or escape is not uncommon. This shift, subtle as it may be, is at the core of what the biblical text refers to as idolatry.

Idolatry, in this context, isn't just the worship of graven images or pagan gods, as one might traditionally think. It's about where we place our ultimate trust and what governs our most critical decisions. When desires or entities other than God take precedence in dictating our actions, especially in areas as integral as our sexuality, it mirrors within the heart the ancient act of idol worship in a modern, personal context.

The enemy of humanity, aka Satan, isn’t looking for more work to do, but rather to use our weakness to pursue that which is not of God and therefore idolatry. In the Bible, we saw Satan disguised as a serpent with Adam and Eve where he played the role of the tempter. He introduced doubt to lead Adam and Eve astray from God’s truth. Anytime people engage with this doubt and allow it to influence their beliefs and actions, they fall prey to what the biblical passage warns against as idolatry.

Sexuality is a profound and integral part of the human experience and therefore, is particularly susceptible to this form of idolatry. When sexual desires and practices are governed by impulses detached from God, they become an expression of idol worship, elevating personal gratification or societal norms above God’s design.

The consequences of such idolatry are not just spiritual or abstract. Paul wrote that they manifest in tangible ways, altering behaviors, preferences, and even societal structures. Romans 1 is a call to introspection for believers, prompting them to consider the guiding forces in their lives, especially in areas as personal and defining as sexuality.

So, let’s review Romans 1, Paul wrote:

For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, But they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened.

They could see God’s decrees, but they decided to do what they wanted anyway. 

• Verse 22-23

Claiming to be wise, they became fools,
And exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling
mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things.  

People worshiped animal-like gods. You can see this in places like India, or in Greek mythology, where they had creatures that were half-human and half-animal.  

• Verses 24-25

Therefore, God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity,

To the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves,  

Because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator,
who is blessed forever! Amen.  

Paul listed the consequences of Adam and Eve’s bad decision. It can happen to us, too. If we worship the serpent instead of God, God will give us up to the consequences of our choice.  

• Verses 26-27

For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged  natural relations for those that are contrary to nature  

And the men likewise gave up natural relations with women
and were consumed with passion for one another,  

Men committing shameless acts with men
and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error. 

Paul gets specific about some consequences God allowed: people turned to homosexuality.  

A gay friend of mine tried to give me a different explanation of those last verses. Don said that it is unnatural for him to like women, so trying to have a heterosexual relationship is  “going against his nature” and how he is made.

I told Don that he was doing what most people do when they twist the Bible to conform to their lives as opposed to conforming their lives to the Bible. And to be fair, this isn’t just what the LGBTQIA+ community does. It’s what all of us do when we take on God’s Design as a great suggestion as opposed to something more immovable like gravity or the effects of fire. 

The reason for this is that when you try to defy gravity, you fall to your death. Immediately. When you play with fire, you get burned. Instantly. When you have sex outside of God’s design, it feels like nothing happens. But there is always damage. Sometimes it’s spiritual and sometimes it’s emotional. Sometimes it is physical. And just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t damaging. We’ll discuss this more in the following blogs.

In conclusion, the discussion around sex and idolatry in Romans 1 is not just a theological caution but an in-depth exploration of human nature, allegiance, and God’s perfect design & purpose for our lives. I want to challenge you to consider your allegiances and what you may be idolizing in your life. What’s your functional savior? What are you putting on the throne in place of God? How have you traded God’s design and purpose for Satan’s tempting schemes? Faith in God and aligning your actions and decisions with His will not only changes the immediate and tangible but also offers eternal freedom & eternal life with God.

It's easy to wonder if God's plan is off-track and the problem is more than our own agenda and plan. After all, how does a God who's invisible and sitting high and mighty on a throne in heaven know anything about what's best for me? Romans 1 clearly explains how humans rejected God’s design when it comes to worshiping him and therefore God gave humanity over to their own sinful hearts. The result of not worshiping God is worshiping something created: self, others, animals. That worship looks like gossip - ruthless, murderous evil - not to mention sex outside of God's design. Homosexuality is clearly communicated here. It is also one of only seven passages that the Bible has on the topic of homosexuality.  Paul wrote, 

“For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with lust for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.”

- Romans 1:26-27 

The gay community calls this one of the primary “the clobber passages,” because some Christians have used them to “clobber” people over the head with the Bible. Those Christians may have had good intentions, but they forgot that people without the Holy Spirit cannot live the Christian life. To be fair, the recognition of sin is a part of our salvation--and also just because you don’t agree that something is sin (anything you think, say or do that displeases God), doesn’t mean you get a pass.

You may have some questions here, like:  

Q: What’s the big deal with salvation? What am I being saved from?  

A: If I were going over a cliff in a raft, I would need salvation from gravity. In this passage, sin is the body slamming onto the rocks at the bottom.  You're being saved from your sin/imperfection. We all have sinned in our thoughts, words, & actions. Salvation is essential to have a relationship with God while on earth, and to have eternal life with God in heaven after death.  

Q: What does sin have to do with salvation? 

A: Sin wrecks hearts & severs relationships. Unfortunately, our sin doesn't just affect us, it has rippling consequences that we can't fix by our own will power. We're broken, terminal & need rescuing.

Q: Aren’t we talking about sex and gender? What does sin have to do with that?  

A: Our culture presents challenges to living God’s design for sex and gender,  which we’ll get into in the next several blogs. And at the heart of these (and many other issues), the real battle is the problem of sin. Anytime we live outside God’s design, we are sinning. And that isn’t just some prude with excessive moral standards controlling other people. Rather this is God’s best for us.  

We don’t like to face this fact, though. We prefer to change the truth and change what love means rather than change our behavior. This is where many have created their own god that understands them and gives them a pass. But gravity doesn’t give a pass to a person who took a wrong step. Fire doesn’t give a pass to a person who didn’t know that it burns. And God is Holy. You can’t tinker with God’s design and not reap the consequences. Gravity makes you fall. Fire makes you burn. Failing to recognize God’s holiness gets wrath.

“For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.

For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them.” 

- Romans 1:18-19  

What does that mean? God’s wrath is coming against all ungodliness and all unrighteousness. Therefore, we all need salvation from our sin—no matter what or “how small” it is. And the “suppressing the truth by their unrighteousness” part? One of the first stories in God’s Word exemplifies how that works. The first humans to interact with God preferred to change the truth and change what love means rather than change their behavior.

In Genesis, God created Adam and Eve. Everything was great. They didn’t have to worry about clothes. They could sing, eat, and have sex.  

Then at some point, they were strolling through the garden when the serpent stopped by.  “Hey, Eve,” he said, “Did God really say you can’t eat from that tree?”  

He was talking, of course, about the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. God had  told Adam that he and Eve should not eat fruit from that tree. It was the one rule that God gave  Adam.  

One rule.  

That’s it.  

Not hard to remember.  

But Satan attacked the one thing that humans were forbidden to do. He attacked the clarity of the boundary that was supposed to bring unity between God and man. As we discussed previously, every relationship needs a boundary for there to be unity. Adam was right there, but as far as we know, he never said a word.  

So the serpent managed to deceive Eve. She took the fruit, ate it, then passed it to Adam. He took a juicy bite, and the next thing you know, they were trying to hide from God and sew some fig leaves without the benefit of a YouTube tutorial.

Satan is still around. He still deceives people into suppressing the truth of God’s Word. Only now, after several thousand years, he’s gotten a lot better at it.  Let’s look at one of his most successful efforts in today’s culture.  

Do No Harm

One of my favorite Thomas Jefferson quotes comes from Notes on the State of Virginia, which he wrote as a defense of America to Europeans. In it he said, “What harm is it to my neighbor if I say there are twenty gods or none?”  

This is a benchmark that made America so much better than Europe. In Europe, the church and the state were one. In fact before the American Revolution every state had a national religion. Politicians had to belong to the national church, affirm its creeds, and attend services. That led to a lot of pseudo-Christians who would just do or say the right things to gain power. Jefferson did not want the church and state to taint each other. 

However, the narrative of his “do no injury” concept has changed over time. Now it means, “I can do whatever I want as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.”  

You’ve said that phrase as a teenager, and now it has become the law of the land.  In reality, though, doing whatever you want does hurt people.  

• It hurts you, especially if what you are doing goes against God’s design. 
• It hurts the state because God’s design—living in a self-sacrificial way, your benefit at my expense—is what is best for the state.  

Culture says we can do what we want, so we must. But if we do, we dictate our worldview to God. We’re saying that we are wiser than He is. We are telling God, “Your instruction manual needs a rewrite.” Like Adam and Eve, we’ll exchange the truth for a lie.  

A little while back, a couple at my church, Paul and Rhianna, got engaged. Before that, they lived together for six years. SIX years. In their minds, they were married. But not only is that not true, it is harmful to deep meaningful intimacy. No matter how you slice it, living together in a sexual relationship makes the relationship transactional. You’d never say that of course, but if you’re a Christian and you know what the Bible says, you say things like, “it’s just easier financially.” That statement couldn’t be more transactional. I mean let’s walk this out. If the reason you are living with someone is because it “just makes financial sense,” you have compromised. I’m assuming you wouldn’t work for a corrupt corporation because it “just makes financial sense.” However, for some reason, we justify sexual intimacy outside of marriage for $570 a month in rent.

Still, Paul and Rhianna were willing to have some “faithful wounds” from their friends and accepted wise counsel. They decided, “Let’s move out.” 

Not an easy decision. It made finances harder. They were used to each other’s habits, and now they had to adjust to new roommates with different habits, people who didn’t “get” them. But instead of listening to culture, instead of elevating man’s opinions, they decided to obey God’s word. And now years later, they are reaping the benefit of that decision. There is deep trust that Rhianna doesn’t have to control Paul to make sure she doesn’t get hurt. Paul is leaning into God’s leading instead of just trying not to make Rhianna mad.

Now, non-Christians can’t do what only the Holy Spirit can empower. They are chasing the elusive god of this age, “Happiness.” Our responsibility is not to stop them but to bring them the good news! Christ has come as the true God to replace our made-up fickle gods with His love and righteousness.  

Sin –our own as well as Adam and Eve’s– separated us from God until Jesus revealed  Himself. Jesus died on the cross for all of our sins. Then He rose from the dead to show the world that He conquered death and the grave. That’s why we have great hope. And that’s why it matters what God we believe in.  

So let’s recap. Gravity makes us fall. Fire makes us burn. Sin makes us separated from God. You can’t change the nature of gravity or fire without being God, He designed it that way. You can’t change the nature of God’s holiness without being God either. He designed it on purpose for His glory and your good. The question is “Will you trust His Word?”

If you are wondering when we are going to get back to Romans 1 and homosexuality…stick around and keep reading this blog.

In our close-knit church community, Jordan recently shared his heartfelt struggle, saying, "I don't want to be whiny, but I don’t understand what God is doing with this struggle in my life." Many of us can relate to that feeling of injustice, questioning why some areas of our lives seem more challenging than others.

From childhood, we've all faced moments that make us say, "It's not fair." We witness others thriving while we grapple with difficulties, leaving us wondering, "Why me?" Jordan, like many, expressed his confusion about his struggle. His struggle is his attraction to men. How could he align with God's plan for his life? He opened up about the fear of getting close to others, fearing that his struggles might alienate him from his community.

As a pastor, I encounter these sentiments frequently. It's not just about same-sex attraction; it extends to various challenges such as strained marriages, feelings of helplessness, and the longing for companionship. Jordan's story, which I'll share in the upcoming blogs, reflects the journey of many who grapple with conflicting feelings and societal expectations.

Jordan's Choice to Follow Christ

I've known Jordan for over six years, and during this time, he transitioned from identifying as gay to choosing a life that aligns with his Christian beliefs. Despite his ongoing attraction to men, he has decided not to pursue a gay lifestyle, viewing it as a choice against what he considers sinful. This decision is counter-cultural, challenging prevailing societal norms.

Over the years, Jordan has matured in his faith, showcasing a level of spiritual growth that rivals those who haven't faced similar struggles. In the following blogs, we'll explore these issues—God's design for sex and identity—through Jordan's story and Heather's, another person who shifted from identifying as same-sex attracted to a Christ-follower seeking to overcome sin.

Understanding God's Design for Sex and Identity

We'll delve into topics such as gender, sexuality, and the divine design for marriage. In today's world, questions about sexual identity have become more prominent. We are asked to specify our preferred pronouns, and the LGBTQ+ movement has brought discussions about sexual orientation to the forefront. In a world where cultural norms often clash with biblical teachings, how we identify ourselves matters. Whether you are a heterosexual Christian, single or married, your choices about sex carry weight. The challenge lies in navigating this reality without isolating ourselves or compromising our beliefs.

Reacting to Challenges: Balancing Truth and Love

When faced with challenges to our faith, Christians often react in one of two ways: circling the wagons or embracing an "anything goes" mentality. The danger lies in either isolating ourselves from the world or compromising our understanding of truth and love. As we explore these topics, we aim to find a balanced approach that allows our light to shine and draws others to God's mercy and grace, without losing sight of our mission as Christians. After all, our journey is not about isolation or conforming to the world's standards but about navigating life's challenges with faith, integrity, and unwavering love.

Yet both of those events—while historic and crazy—pale beside the social and sexual new normal people are clamoring for, the debates in legislatures and court systems, and the realities we find ourselves living in. Things are happening now that, ten years ago, we laughed and rolled our eyes at as satire in The Babylon Bee. Turns out, the Bee was prophetic. We live in a new normal where anything goes: how you handle sexuality, marriage, and relationships is completely in your hands. 

How should Christians face this social and sexual new normal? How should we ourselves behave? How should we view others whose behaviors fly in the face of what we believe?

As a pastor, I get these questions all the time. That is why I believe that its message is so urgently needed among believers.

As time progresses, the Church has always had to face new dilemmas and new situations. The challenge is to not compromise. It’s almost humorous to see churches that were known for their conservatism in the 40s and 50s are now those adopting liberal approaches to theology and life in light of modern day events. The culture used to be conservative. And those churches just followed the culture to liberalism and then eventually left orthodoxy altogether. The Bible for some has become read through the lens of culture. However, for those who see God’s Word as perfect and never changing, we see the cultural pendulum swings and battle not against flesh and blood, but against the spiritual forces of darkness calling us to abandon the truth of God’s Word and Design alongside the Grace we desperately need. 

We Need an Anchor

Up until the last couple of decades, Western society in general had an understanding of the framework it rested on: the Judeo-Christian tradition. No one had to argue for God’s design regarding sex, singleness, and serious relationships. That understanding anchored us; the tide might push us one direction, the winds another, but the anchor of the Judeo-Christian tradition kept us from drifting too far. 

Increasingly, however, our culture seems to be cutting loose from that anchor. When the documentary What is a Woman?  by Matt Walsh came out, Christians and non-Christians alike looked at each other, confused: where do we draw the line? That question has always bothered me since my dating days. How far is too far? It’s the wrong question. Perhaps the better question is how do we best honor God and how do we seek to be Grace and Truth in a world that has completely abandoned the Truth. That’s why I want to examine what God has said about sex, singleness, and serious relationships and see how we can apply it to today’s issues. 

In This Blog

This blog looks at the way three aspects of human lives are connected:

1. Sexuality. This is a basic instinct for humans, an urge most of us have. God designed sex as something for us to enjoy. We’ll look at what His design is, how sin corrupts it, and how we can deal with our sexuality knowing that sin is in the equation.
2. Relationships. God wired humans for relationship. The brain of even the most introverted loner responds to interaction with other humans. From a scientific standpoint, we survive best and thrive in community—relationships with other humans.
3. Holiness. God is holy, separate from sin. If you have placed your faith in Jesus for salvation, His blood makes you holy in God’s sight so that you can be in relationship with Him and empowers you through His Holy Spirit to live the holy life to which He called you. We’ll look at how our sexuality and our relationships intersect with this call to holiness.

Sexuality and Relationships

God intended sex for marriage. If you take sex away from marriage, you change the nature of sex. It is no longer covenantal; it is self-gratifying. Even in consensual hook-ups, each person is looking out for his or her own benefit. In marriage, sex is a consummation of a relationship, the most intimate relationship possible between two humans.

Sexuality and Holiness

Because God designed sex for marriage, inevitably, sex in marriage is holy. To change or deviate from God’s design makes it unholy. 

Unfortunately, many people only know a parody of Christianity’s view on sex, such as only “missionary-style” is the appropriate position. This has led to a characterization of Christian marital sex as prudish. In reality, sex in marriage should be “my spouse’s benefit at my expense,” a symbol of God’s love for us. That is His design.

Our brains are meant to be satisfied with God’s design. As John Piper says, “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.” That is living in holiness. However, because of sin, we may need to retrain our brains from a path of darkness to the path of light. The Apostle Paul wrote in his letter to the Colossians that we are to put to death what is earthly: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness and then put on what is godly: compassionate hearts, kindness, meekness, patience, and forgiveness (Colossians 3:5,12-13).

If you are not living in holiness, you can repent, and God designed your body to be rewarded when you repent and use it in holiness. We know that what gets rewarded gets repeated. God knows it too. We’ll get into how the reward centers of the brain work to train the repentant brain in holiness instead of training it for the darkness you may have known. 

Relationships and Holiness

The connection between relationships and holiness is bidirectional. Not only does holiness improve our relationships, but our relationships can help us become holier. There are several anchors of the soul: God’s Word (The Bible), God’s Spirit (the Holy Spirit), and God’s people (The Church). We’ll get into this more in Chapter 5, but for now it’s important to note that each of these should impact our lives as Christians. Each one is a way that God can center us so we can take risks (or what seem to be risks) for Him and live out God’s Word in a way that goes against culture. 

Who This Blog is For

I’m addressing this blog to Christians, people who have put their faith in Jesus, believing that He died on the cross to pay for their sins and that He rose the third day. These are the people whose questions I am answering. This blog should point you to the Bible for explanations on the issues we face in today’s world so that you can know His will and “be transformed by the renewing of your mind” as Paul wrote in his letter to the Romans challenging believers to live a holier life.

If you are not a Christian, you may find this blog confusing, controversial, or even offensive. That’s okay. It’s further evidence of its truth. The Gospel offends every culture everywhere in some aspect. But I do want you to invite and consider that what Christians believe and practice may be the very thing that is missing in your life and turning your life over to Him may be the greatest gift you could ever receive.

Let’s get started.